Archive for the ‘endometriosis’ Category

CD 7; herbs; upcoming lap

Unfortunately no pregnancy to report. I did make it to 14 dpo without a temp drop though, which is better than the last five months. 14 days used to be my normal LP, so hopefully the vitex that I took for 1.5 months has had a hand in that.

This month, we’re officially not trying, because my laparoscopy is scheduled for Nov. 5, right around the time when I would be getting my period, and I don’t want to worry about being pregnant at that time. Not to mention that with our upcoming trip to Africa, we can’t afford to delay the lap any further. The idea of taking a break actually feels surprisingly good.

These days I am a lot busier, what with a new contract that keeps me busy two days a week, plus teaching, plus thesis-related work, plus preparing a sermon for three weeks from now. It helps to be busy, but I still feel a general, light layer of sadness (kind of like a light grey blanket) draped over me a lot of the time. More when I get up in the morning. I was thinking about it this morning and realizing that this is not normal for me, but I have been feeling this way for several months now – probably since I got my endo diagnosis. I need to think about this, because I don’t want to get into a rut.

On a more positive note, I am excited about trying several different herbs after my lap to maximize my chances of conception. I’m seeing my RE next week and will run my plan by him just to be sure, although up until now he has said that he knows nothing about herbs at all (and doesn’t seem to believe they make any difference…). I’ll also ask a herbalist if I can find one. I’ve discovered a couple of great places where you can order organic herbs in bulk. Mountain Rose Herbs is one.  Closer to home, Herboristerie Desjardins is another. I’ll almost certainly continue taking Vitex throughout the cycle, EPO until ovulation. I’m also thinking about burdock (to help the liver clear the excess estrogen from the body), cramp bark and red raspberry (to tone uterus and help with inflammation), horsetail (to prevent the formation of scar tissue and keep existing scar tissue flexible), and echinacea for the immune system. By the way, this information comes from Mother Nature, but I have seen similar information on other websites. Have any of you had any results from using any of these herbs? I have certainly noticed less breast tenderness during LP, a longer menstrual cycle, and better CM since I started taking EPO and vitex a couple of months ago.

I am supposed to be writing a grammar test for my students, so I had better get back to that now…


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12 dpo

So, thanks to Fertilit.yFrie.nd, I can overlay several charts over my current one. The yellow line is the current cycle. Tomorrow is the day where my temp either stays up, or it doesn’t. Cool, eh?

A very close friend of mine was just diagnosed with endo. She is understandably very shaken up. Being able to share this experience provides some comfort to both of us, I think. We even have the same RE. But of course, I so much wish she didn’t have to go through this at all. She is already dealing with other fertility issues, and this is another setback.

We prayed together this morning as we do regularly. In her prayer, she said she is not always sure of the point of praying. I could relate. My recent thinking has moved me to a different place on this issue. I have started to see prayer more as a realignment with reality than a forum for requests or an “audience with God”. Yet it is more than just personal therapy. Proclaiming what is true is an act of faith – an act God calls us to. It is done together with others in an alternative community. Some things we can proclaim about infertility : God is a good Creator. What he creates (including our bodies) is beautiful. He does not delight in our suffering. He suffers with us. We can trust his good intentions for our lives.

At 12 DPO I’m having some watery CM. I read somewhere that this was a sign of a pre-AF estrogen surge. May it not be true! Otherwise, I feel fine; great mood, no pain or cramps, just a stronger sense of smell and a more sensitive appetite than usual (but usual pre-AF). Oh well. We’ll see soon enough.

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Empowerment and realism

Yesterday, at my pre-laparoscopy appointment with the surgeon, I had an ultrasound with the nicest technician I’ve met yet. She explained everything she was measuring, and complimented me on my great-looking uterus and right ovary. There was a beautiful follicle, somewhere between 2 and 3 cm in diameter, ready to pop on my right ovary. It made my day to hear about the parts of my body that ARE working well! We made the most of today, what with EWCM, high, soft, open cervix, and the knowledge that ovulation would be happening any moment (if it wasn’t already too late). I had a long talk with dh about whether or not my desire to make the most of these factors was due to a need to control something that actually is out of my hands, and if so, whether that is OK or not. Question somewhat unresolved. I do feel that by taking my fertility into my own hands, I am reclaiming it from the doctors and medical system, and this can feel somehow empowering. But at the same time, I was in tears even at the thought of “wasting” the great opportunity of today. I’m sure many other IF bloggers out there can relate. And I can’t help thinking about our many months of trying and telling myself that this will have been the best timing ever – so maybe we will beat the odds and conceive on our own this month! Realistically, this is probably not something I should dwell on too much.

This morning dh and I explained what a blog was to a 50-something woman from our community who stopped in to have coffee with us. She said she had come to see us in order to get some of our energy. I also was interviewed by a journalist today, and accepted a linguistics contract (to start next week) at a 5$ per hour higher rate than I have earned until now. Finally, I made cinnamon rolls. All in all, quite a day. Now I’m going to try to settle down and do some more work on translating my thesis.

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